Yesterday, we talked about cleaning out your life and only doing the things are really important to you. But what if there is something that is important, and you just don't want to do it?
I've recently decided that there are 2 different kinds of "important" -
1) Important things that you do for other people
2) Important things that are essential to your being
We'll discuss #2 tomorrow. Today, we're going to focus on the important things that you do for other people. And we all differ as to what tasks fall under which category. For me, the things that fall under #1 are things like taking care of my children, introducing myself to my neighbors, volunteering at school. My business falls under #2 for me, because it just flows out of who I am. But your job or business may fall under #1 for you. So, let's talk about the important things you do for other people that you just don't want to do.
As I said yesterday, when we don't want to do something it's usually because someone else has put it on our list and we have no innate desire to do it. You are always going to drag your feet if you do not FEEL the importance.
Why is it important?
If you just don't understand why it is important, talk to people about it. Sometimes we need someone to explain the REASON behind something. Sometimes, we need someone to explain to us how to actually do it. ASK. Maybe it's not important, and the person granting you the task has never thought it through. But maybe it is important and nobody had ever explained it to you.
Now that we've resolved that it is really important to YOU, what do we do? I've come across several solutions that work for different situations -
1 -Outsource - It's important that my children eat food every day, but I don't enjoy cooking anymore. All of my creative energies go toward designing clothes. So, I outsource a lot of the cooking to Trader Joe's during the week and my husband on the weekend. (I didn't even have to ask either of them. They just stepped up to the plate.)
2 - Streamline - Habits streamline your day. Think about what you do everyday. Most of it is habit. It's hard to build new habits, but once they are there, you do them without thinking. I HATE telling my kids what to do at every stage of the evening ("brush your teeth", "put away your shoes", "get in bed"), so I talked to several women about this issue to see how they are handling it. I got a lot of good advice, and now I'm working really hard to build up a routine that will run itself. (One child is taking to this process more quickly than the other.)
3 - Add something to it - You've heard me say before that I don't really like to sew, but it's kind of essential to my business, so I added a super fun bonus to that task. I listen to podcasts and videos while I sew. Now, it is my favorite time of day. And I think I'm liking the actual sewing more now that I'm getting better at it. (Favorite video series right now is Chase Jarvis Live.)
4 - View it through your "gift lens" - We all have different ways of viewing and doing the same task. We all have different "gifts" and can inject our own personality into what we are trying to accomplish. I don't like teaching my children (or anyone) how to do things. I'm more of a "sharer" than a "teacher". As in - "I'll share what I've learned with you, but I don't want to take the time to walk you through it." That makes it a little difficult to be a mother.
However, one of my gifts is that I LOVE to learn. It's might be my favorite thing in the world to do. I recently had a flash of insight as I was thinking about how people learn best - apprenticeship. The fastest way to learn a new skill is by working under a MASTER. I'm not a real master at anything...but to my children I am. So, for the past week, I've been thinking about my children as "my little apprentices". It transforms my whole desire for the "mothering" process. I mentioned to my oldest daughter that she was my apprentice and she said, "I want to learn everything you know."
So, what's something important that you just don't want to do? And how are you dealing with it?